Practical tips on how to set Boundaries

Practical tips on how to set Boundaries…

The title of this blog, “Practical tips on how to set Boundaries” forms part of a SERIES ON BOUNDARIES with the following Index:

• Blog 1:  Introduction: What are Boundaries?
• Blog 2:  How NOT to take on Undelegated Responsibility
• Blog 3:  “Being needed” and Boundaries
• Blog 4:  Help with overcoming the fear of man and people pleasing
• Blog 5:  Busy People and Boundaries
• Blog 6:  Overcoming Control by setting Boundaries
• Blog 7:  Practical tips on how to set Boundaries

Practical tips on how to set Boundaries…

Here are some final thoughts that will help you in your journey of healthy boundaries…

• You cannot expect everyone around you to read your mind. You need to respectfully communicate your boundaries. Your communication must be clear, and your recipients must understand exactly what you mean. In a family/household context, everyone must be on the ‘same page’.
• If you let someone overstep your boundaries, you cannot blame them, you only have yourself to blame. Setting boundaries is your responsibility.
• Respect other people’s boundaries. You cannot expect others to respect your boundaries if you habitually overstep theirs.
• Boundaries must be reasonable and practical. Example: If I plan to have “Quiet Time” with the Lord between 06:00 – 07:00 am and do not want to be disturb, plan ahead. If you know you kids wake up at that time with hungry tummies, it is unreasonable from you not to expect them to knock on your door for food (that is if they are small and cannot help themselves yet).
• If you struggle with boundaries, ask someone to hold you accountable.
• It is important to know your personal values. Example: If positivity and honouring is 2 of your values and someone approaches you in a conversation where they complain about someone else, spew gossip and cynicism; dishonour and slander someone else’s name, what do you do? You have to set a boundary. How?
  • (a) Disengage as quickly as possible in the conversation in a respectful way or
  • (b) Challenge them in a respectful way to rather talk about themselves and not about others in a negative way. Someone once said, “If you can’t say anything positive about someone, rather keep quiet”…
• Setting HEALTHY boundaries is part of self-care and healthy self-love… Boundaries creates safety, security, and respect: An environment where love can grow: Love for yourself; love for others and love for God…

“And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ This is the first commandment. And the second, like it, is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.”’ (Mark 12:30-31 NKJV).

Also see the poetic Passion Translation:

“You are to love the Lord Yahweh, your God, with every passion of your heart, with all the energy of your being, with every thought that is within you, and with all your strength. This is the great and supreme commandment. And the second is this: ‘You must love your neighbor in the same way you love yourself.’ You will never find a greater commandment than these.” (Mark 12:30-31 TPT)

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Discover more ABOUT BOUNDARIES – We recommend to read the following Blogs in sequence: 

• Blog 1:  Introduction: What are Boundaries?
• Blog 2:  How NOT to take on Undelegated Responsibility
• Blog 3:  “Being needed” and Boundaries
• Blog 4:  Help with overcoming the fear of man and people pleasing
• Blog 5:  Busy People and Boundaries
• Blog 6:  Overcoming Control by setting Boundaries
• Blog 7:  Practical tips on how to set Boundaries